You know you have been poolside for too long when:
• You become concerned about the wellbeing of Mavis from lounger number 3 when she hasn't arrived by 10.00am.
• You've actually numbered the loungers.
• You notice that Sergei is off his game as he is down two laps from yesterday.
• You're worried that Kim and Kayne's marriage might be on the rocks.
• You feel it is your moral duty to tell Dianne and Barry that their partners, Julie and Dave, are having an affair.
• You're ready to inform 15 year old Missy that her face will stay like that if the wind changes.
• Marjorie's tan goes from sun-kissed to Beef Jerky.
• Ketut brings you a Pina Colada at 4.00pm without even asking.
• You start fantasising that Thorne will morph from the pages of your bodice ripper and ravish you right then and there.
• You start comparing Thorne to Big Red. Sigh...
• You consider Thorne as a potential baby name for Kate and William.
• You become concerned that young Sebastian's hearing may need checking.
• You never realised that the name Sebastian could be stretched to four syllables.
• You resent newcomers entering your poolside domain.
• You're ready to call the Quit Line about your newly acquired pack-a-day passive smoking habit care of Mr Hyong on lounger 8.
• You're now feeling comfortable enough to have that conversation with Sharon about wearing orange.
• You want to take Robbo to task over the neglect of his festering tattoo.
• You want to take Robbo to task over his excessive drinking.
• You just want to take Robbo to task!
With too much time on her hands,
Miss M
* Most names have been created on a whim. Rest assured, Seb/as/ti/an is very, very real. ☺