The mild version! It's our wedding anniversary. I have woken with a horrendous feeling of getting a flu! After a cuddle and whatever, I exit the bedroom area and I Frisbee my hubby his anniversary card and throw his little present on top of the doona and sit down to open my card. I am confused...there is nothing in my card...no lotto ticket no gift no nothing.....just words! Last year he bought me an eternity ring and this year I get squat? What the hell? Only joking....I already knew that last year's eternity ring was to last me the next 5 anniversary's given the cost of the thing! Hubby looks embarrassed that he hasn't bought me anything especially when he clocks the little bundle wrapped in paper. I tell him not to worry that it is only a silly novelty gift and it only cost $6.95. With a look of dejection (possibly at the amount I spent on him) he looks at it and declares that it looks like a book, his face drops even more. My darling hubby doesn't read books at all - he hates reading. The most he reads would be the newspaper! It is a book I say...he tries to look happy but clearly fails. He unwraps it and smiles - he declares he loves the book! I had bought him a book with pictures...that's all I am going to say! He suggests we put the book to use now, but I wave him off bleating my flu like symptoms.
We decided against going for a walk and before we know it, our chef has arrived and is making our continental breakfast. Our chef asks why hubby is not having cooked breakfast and he declares he wants to save himself for his babi guling. Crap- that's right we are going there today! Another lost day of tanning. I must say the sun has been beating down every day since our arrival which according to friends that had arrived 5 days earlier than us was a miracle as they had only experienced cloudiness and rain! I glance longingly at the pool and my bathers and again with a heavy heart and sigh head inside to await my massage. We had arranged with the villa for a massage each at 10am. The massage girls arrive and put our aching bones through the paces. I feel like I am a scrambled egg at the end of my massage. I am fluid throughout my body and feel great!
Ding Dong goes the doorbell, hubby bolts off the bed to answer it - Wayan of course, I try to cover myself with my sarong before he lets him in but one gravity defying boob abandons the sarong and so to the shocked gaze of two little girls (Wayans daughters) I haul ass to the bathroom. Of course I haven't thought forward enough to even put what I am going to wear in the bathroom, so I emerge again - sarong firmly in place and I am greeted with an enormous bunch of flowers that Wayan and his family have bought for us. My thanks over with, I head to change whilst hubby ushers them outside the villa. I yell out to hubby that he might want to get changed too considering he is still walking around in his underwear!!! He clocks my gaze and with a mortified glance at Wayans young daughters heads inside to change too!
Suitably attired we head off to Ibu Oka for the Babi Guling. I dutifully inform Wayan that I am not a fan of pork - he cannot believe this - who doesn't like pork? He advises me that I will like this pork as it is done the traditional way in Balinese spice etc. I advise him again that I don't do pork but that I would happily go and eat elsewhere whilst they feast on this great pig! There are two Ibu Oka's in Ubud - one on the outskirts and one in central Ubud. He decides that we will go to the one that is on the outskirts in case the traffic is bad in Ubud (all this said whilst giving me the look through the rear view mirror - good to see he hasn't forgotten our road trip from hell!!). Before we arrive at the famous Ibu Oka, Wayan drops me off at some random restaurant overlooking rice paddies where I will partake in lunch alone! Hubby looks longingly at me, his eyes pleading me to stay with the group but I am determined to go this alone and with a backward glance, a wave at the departing car, head upstairs to relax and possibly partake in some lunch.
The view was pleasant enough and I was able to sit right at the front of the restaurant overlooking the rice paddies and a swimming pool. There was only me at the restaurant but not for long. I wasn't too hungry given that it was only midday and after perusing the menu decided on veggie soup. I knew that a chicken foccacia would be too ambitious (even though it was the same price as the soup). I ordered a bintang and it arrived promptly with some complimentary nuts! Love the nuts in Bali, skin still on and slightly salted. YUM! I was enjoying the tranquility of the view whilst sipping my bintang when a loud group of 9 Germans arrive and sit at two of the tables to the right of me. They stare at me as if it is a foreign sightseeing a lovely woman by herself at a table with a bintang! I ignore them but cannot but fail to hear them order coffees and each couple and the lone person demand separate billing! Wow - its coffee - its like not that hard to split a bill between the 9 of them! My soup arrives and they study it intently as I did myself. For 60,000 rp ++ (can't forget the ++) I am given a tea cup sized bowl of soup and no bread! I was so disappointed!!! I should have gone the chicken foccacia. I decide I need to eat my soup slowly as I don't know how long Wayan and hubby will be gone for....it is a hard job trying to stretch out a soup that possible has only 5 spoonfuls in it! The Germans decide to take photos and without so much as an excuse me or beg your pardon, barge in front of my table, block my view and pose in various photos! How rude? I am trying to sip my soup and they are inches away from me striking poses whilst blocking my view and overlooking my somewhat dismal soup. Wayan and hubby pull up eventually and declare the streets of Ubud clear enough for us to go and get my sandals/thongs. I always get my thongs from this little shop opposite the Monkey Forest entrance - in my 5 years of buying them from here I have found them to last the longest. The quality is fantastic. I enquire as to how they enjoyed their lunch and they inform me that I should have stuck with them as I could have had soup, rice etc - oh well, lesson learned. I can tell hubby is dying to speak to me out of earshot of Wayan as he keeps giving me these looks....
So we are heading to central Ubud and the traffic is at a standstill....Wayan is fearfully glancing at me in the RV mirror - gauging my reaction. It is literally not moving and doesn't appear to for ages. We are no closer to the shop and even if we got out to walk there it is still a long way off!! I blame Eat Pray Love for this steady increase in interest in Ubud! I spot a street to the left of me and ask Wayan where it leads...he says out of Ubud - I say floor it! Apologies all the way for a good 5 minutes and I say its okay Wayan - I can get thongs elsewhere! Do we want to go anywhere else, Wayan asks - Back to the villa I say - I need some colour. We are dropped off at the villa and will see Wayan and his wife tonight as they will share our anniversary dinner. Time to get some pool time in. Hubby and I chillax by the pool - I am still feeling yucky from this oncoming flu but determined to soldier on! It is then that Hubby tells me he didn't know what the big deal was about the Ibu Oka place - he got the smallest piece of pork crackling and the serve of pork was not very big - trying not to smirk, I sympathise with him.
Wayan and his wife arrive at the villa at 6pm - I am just out of the shower and feeling the pressure to hurry up and get dressed....not sure why they arrived so early but can only put it down to the fact that they have a babysitter at home. Much debating about where to eat....I am looking at something affordable given that our party of 2 has increased to 4 and Wayan is intent on listing all the 5 star restaurants in the vicinity with 5 star prices to match...Hubby is wisely staying out of the argument! We decide to cruise the main street and stop somewhere we fancy. Hubby spots a place which I had already dismissed and we pile out the car and peruse the menu. Happy with the menu he decides this is the place - sorry can't remember the name of it for the life of me! Wayans wife speaks limited English so again it is hard to have a conversation with her and I always feel a little bit guilty talking in English when I know she can barely understand! We order our meals and they dutifully arrive - Mrs Wayan is having fish, Wayan is having pizza, hubby is having mixed seafood and I am having mushroom pasta. Well Mrs Wayan was the clear winner in the meals stake! I try not to eye of her lovely large piece of fish and get stuck into my mushroom pasta which appears to be saturated in cream. Hubby is the clear loser in the meal stakes out of all of us. He had visions of his mixed seafood being fresh cooked seafood of all variations possibly nestled over some rice. Instead he got deep fried mixed seafood, akin to the fishermans baskets you can receive at the local pub here but minus the chips! He possibly had around 8 pieces of breadcrumbed pieces on his plate - far too little for a strapping husband like mine. Wayan and hubby normally trade pieces of their meal but it was clear from Wayans face that he would be getting a raw deal and he protectively covered and ate his pizza. Hubbys mood was darkening and he was muttering about what a crap place it was and how it wasn't how he pictured the anniversary dinner to be and we should have gone somewhere else etc etc. I kindly pointed out he had chosen this place...not me. His expression is too much to bear and I decide that much as I am starving, having only had my tea cup sized soup at midday, that I was full and invited hubby to finish my meal. His pleading eyes whilst asking me if I was sure were enough to melt the stoniest of hearts and I assured him that yes I was sure. He wolfed it down!
Thinking another glass of wine would be nice, I signal the waitress and Wayan and Mrs Wayan take this as we are leaving and up they jump and say they will meet us at the car! I look at hubby, he is looking just as startled as me. I guess we are leaving I say to him and ask for the bill! We pay the bill and Wayan drops us off at the villa - it is a very early 7.30pm. We decide a couple of drinks are in order along with possibly the biggest bag of Chipolata's I have seen. It wasn't the anniversary we expected nor really hoped for but c'est la vie!