This trip was a totally unplanned trip to Bali. On September 25th my beloved husband passed away extremely suddenly, leaving behind a broken family- myself, our eldest daughter 24 years, middle daughter 19 years and our son 16 years. We all knew that we had to return to Bali with his ashes.
Over the last ten years we discovered Bali, its wonderful spiritual quality and it's wonderful people. On our first visit we were invited into the temple to participate in a ceremony and my husband always said that it was drinking the holy water that first time that continued our ongoing love for Bali. Our children have visited the island 14 times and we have been blessed with the time that we have spent on those family holidays. A full 4 weeks each trip of being with them 7 days a week is more than some families spend over a lifetime. We have spent between 2 and 3 weeks each visit on Nusa Lembongan and have made many friends there. We all agreed that my husband would wish to have some of his remains scattered on the reef at Lembongan with a Balinese ceremony and some of his special friends.
We arrived in Bali on 12th October and stayed at the Lumbung Sari Beach Hotel at Legian and everyone remembered us from our last trip in April. We soon got used to every local saying ‘oh I just got goose bumps up my arms' every time we had to tell someone the bad news. Uncle Norms and Billy's bar were very difficult, as we had spent many a happy family meal there. On the last visit to Billy's my middle daughter bought a Billy's Singlet and we all signed it and it was to put on the wall, so if you are visiting say hi to Arnie from all of us.
Having spent 4 days in Bali we caught the Perama over to Lembongan. As soon as we arrived in Sanur we were surrounded with memories of my beautiful husband. The minimart where you buy your ticket from, Muglie the assistant from the Perama, were all asking ‘where's Papa', and yes there were lots of goose bumps. The staff from Puri Nusa where we stay were all on the beach waiting for us when we arrived. We felt there love and support immediately.
We spent the next few days organising a good day on the Balinese calendar and the 24th October was selected as a good day and also the day that the spirits leave the Island.
With heavy hearts we gathered on the day and boarded our friends boat. We headed for the break called Lacerations. A rock had been signed by us all and also contained the dates and names etc of my husband. We all also signed a further tile. The offerings had all been blessed by the priest and were then put in the boat. We drove to the pontoon and moored and commenced the ceremony. The surfers and non-surfers all formed a horse shoe around the boat, our son had one offering on his board and our middle daughter had a large offering that needed to be dunked deep into the ocean. Our eldest daughter held the ashes urn, that had holy water already added to it. Following our friend's blessing of the offerings the ceremony progressed with the ashes first and then the dunking of the large offering and then our sons offering. A surfboard was then loaded with the rock and tile and another offering basket with fruits and cakes, and was paddles out to the reef where the surf breaks. The rock was lodged in a crevice in the reef with the tile and the urn wedged in along side. We all returned to the beach with a great sense of spirituality.
And as the great Australian culture demands we then had a great wake! Many bintangs drunk. Gee I love to see the locals have a drink or two.
Since returning to Australia the kids have all said that the ceremony helped in a closure form, for all of them. I actually return to Bali end of January with my eldest daughter for what was planned as my 25th wedding anniversary, it won't be the same but it will add to the wonderful peaceful Bali memories.
To everyone, make the most of every trip.