John Brown JBR 2
I awoke the following morning to a beautiful day and tried to rouse Theresa for a walk. She wasn't that interested as she apparently spent quite a bit of time getting cocktail lessons from the muscly cocktail man the night before.
She did manage to murmur through her half sleep that one of his friends even helped to show her another way to do them.
I must get her to show me a Jiggy Jig when we get back home. They sound like a lovely drink.
Strolling casually through the hotel I suddenly spied the young man who had ogled my wife's rack the previous day walking towards me. As he neared he slightly bowed his head towards me and said ‘Slam Hat pudgy'.
I realised immediately that this was his way to apologise for the incident and that he wanted to be punished. Unfortunately I wasn't wearing a hat to slam him with, so I just gave him a good thick ear followed by a quick back hander and a lecture for referring to my weight in such a manner.
I then wandered off happy knowing that we were now sorted and could be friends.
He was so happy he just stood there crying.
I finally hit the streets of Bali.
Just before impact I remembered what Bert had said about the size of the kerbs.
As I got up and dusted myself off I made a mental note to myself that it would be best if Theresa walks in the front so that I can warn her of any dangers she is about to encounter.
Resuming my walk I felt a nagging feeling that I had missed something important. I racked my mind for what it could be. Just at that moment I noticed a tourist being handed their purchase in a shop I was passing. That purchase was in a Black and White striped bag.
Then it hit me... like a Collingwood supporter in a back alley.
The kerbs in this street were black and white. The bags from the store were black and white. I'd hit paydirt .
Bert had told me that if you get handed your purchases in a black and white bag that you have gotten the best price and are great at bargaining. He then told me how he found a street with black and white kerbs, by falling down them as I did, so purchased everything he could at the first price offered.
I believe he got some great ‘genuine label' shirts for less than $100 each.
How fortunate that I booked a hotel in that very street. We Brown's are a lucky lot.
It wasn't until I got home that I researched this further here on the Forum and found the truth.
Here it is.
Red Bag: Drinks red cordial every day and has sickly sweet breath
Black Bag: Mud Guts, will not fart or take big steps
B&W Striped Bag: Has Bali Belly and probably stripes in Undies
White Bag: Been here one day, not yet sh!t themselves, wallet is readily opened
Blue Bag: Heart Condition, make quick sale
Green Bag: Jealous Wife, don't flirt or no sale
Pink Bag: Not that there's anything wrong with that!
Polka Dot Bag: You're actually a white bag shopper, but all they had was a black bag and a white bag that they got Djurian in at the Pasar pagi.
Damn that Bert, I knew I shouldn't have taken his word for anything.
After my bag and kerb episode I wandered back down to the hotel to locate Theresa who had now made her way to the pool.
I found her sitting with the pool boy, who obviously has a sideline selling fruit, as he told her, he could give her a bigger banana than the barman.
Theresa, being the kind soul that she is, told him she would have a look later.
I hope they don't take advantage of her giving nature.
We headed out to the tour desk at the front of the hotel to see how we should start our adventure.
There were so many options that we found it hard to choose.
One thing I couldn't believe though was that people were paying $US20 to go to Waterbomb Park.
Do you know how many packets of balloons you can get for that at home?
Weeks of Waterbomb fun for that price.
The young man at the desk offered us a tour up some mountain to ‘Count da Money Village' but the idea of seeing some rich Italian bloke in Bali wasn't that appealing.
We eventually decide on seeing some local music and dance so Theresa picked the Singer Raja tour.
Just my bloody luck, bloody Raja's concert must have been cancelled that day and all we got was waterfalls and two hours of a bloke jumping around the stage dressed like a frog or a monkey. No singing at all.
Went down to the famous S&S that night hoping to catch up with the wonderful and very helpful Eom. I've seen so many postings here saying ‘Thanks Eom' that I just wanted to thank him personally for all the help he obviously gives.
Unfortunately he didn't turn up, so I gave Sammie some money to buy him a beer when he did.
Sammie assured me that he would.
Back at the hotel for dinner and I was still one day away from the special chicken on skewers with peanut sauce, so I decided to try something local instead of steak and chips.
The pepper steak and wedges with sour cream sounded exotic so I asked the waiter if it was a local dish.
He replied that the steak was from Bali and so were the potato's.
Great to finally be immersing myself in the local culture.
More later
John Brown